new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
