I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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