the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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