i don't like sucking hair
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
