Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
