Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
