when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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