i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I wish you could order shots online.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
