Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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