i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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