once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
