dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.