no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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