soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I think your dad took our porno
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
