He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
