waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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