we're chasing vodka with high fives
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
and she was petting her beer can
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
