There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize