dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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