the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
