ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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