I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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