nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
