She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
21 Texts That Prove All the Magic Happens in Parking Lots
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter