if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
it glows. i had to have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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