I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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