I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize
