Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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