you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
