i don't like sucking hair
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Stone age, man.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea