He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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