Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize