just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
