Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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