Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
