Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
