Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
