wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
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