have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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