she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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