We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I just googled if crying burns calories
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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