It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
