then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize