people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize