Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
