I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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