some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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