when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize