Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
