No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
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