I only kidnapped one of them. chill
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
